"When you grow up, you will understand...." so my father would tell me, in trying to justify the rancour which resulted in a bitter marriage break-up with my mother when I was 18 years old, and my subsequent alienation from my father for the rest of his life.
I did not understand then; I still did not understand when my father, then a few years later, my mother, passed away. Even when I created this internet site "in their honour" over ten years ago, I still did not understand my father's anger towards my mother.
Now, twenty years later and almost 70, with a different view of what life is about, I still do not fully understand the anger in his heart towards my mother and, indirectly, to me. I do, however, understand the circumstances in his past which may have led him on the mutually destructive course he followed. I do believe I could have been more understanding at the time.
Since writing this initial site, I have no new information - no stunning revelations. I only have a new insight on things as they were. I am also guilty of using the new version to provide a small window into my own life in those times.
My parents, Roza and Godel Mydlarz, and I migrated to Australia from Lodz, Poland, in December 1957.
My parents were survivors of the Holocaust and married a few years after being liberated. My mother's entire family, except for her sister Ruth, was murdered by the Nazis. My father, as we found many decades later, had been married before the war and had two children, who also perished in the Holocaust along with the rest of his family.
There are few if any records of my parents' life before the war. Although I have a few photographs of my mother's family, and although my mother made me familiar with her wartime and pre-war past from my early childhood in Poland, my father spoke little about his own past, and I do not even know which area in Poland he and his family came from, or most of his war-time whereabouts. It is indeed as if his family had never existed.
The information contained in these pages is not based on deep research into the Holocaust, but rather on personal testimony from people close to me, and is correct to the best of my knowledge.
If there are any errors, they are not intentional and I welcome the advice of anyone with details that could enhance the precision of my records.
In the current version of this site, I have not had the text proof read for spelling or grammatical errors in any way. I feel it is adequate if the meaning and sentiment is reasonably clear.
In compiling the following collection of photographs and other information that I have acquired, I was hoping that there would be people who knew or have some record - of my mother's or father's pre-war or war existence, and that if they read this that they would contact me with their information.
I would like to express my gratitude to my Uncle, the late Icek Cytrynowski. In writing his book "And I will Remember my Covenant", about his life in Lodz and the Holocaust, he gave me the inspiration to create this site.
A very deep and heartfelt gratitude goes to my very good friend, Paul Frajberg. As a fourteen year old youth Paul saw his father dragged away to be shot by the Nazis. His mother was gassed. Paul has provided me with a most valuable insight into life of those terrible times.
During my visits, with Paul in his 90s and me in my late 60s, Paul has re-lived those times, and has made me full of regret that in my youth - sometimes called "selfish youth" - I had not made an effort to find out more about my own father's past.
More recently, in February 2010, I was contacted by Avichai Z. who in the process of searching for his ancestors, came across records pertaining to my father's first wife and children. My deep thanks go to Avichai for taking the trouble to notify me of his findings.
A non-Jewish friend of mine remarked that "the Holocaust was only one event for the Jews..." I feel I should qualify on that: The Holocaust was not one "event", not one massacre... It was a vast collection of massacres carried out across Europe between 1939 and 1945, not only by the Nazis, but by the native population of many countries. In numerous cases entire villages of Jews were wiped out - the Jews murdered brutally by the local non-Jewish inhabitants.
Nor was The Holocaust the only catastrophe to befall the Jewish race. In more notable cases such as under the Romans, the Spanish Inquisition and the more recent pogroms in Tsarist Russia, as well as at many other times over the millennia, the Jews suffered genocide against them. The Holocaust between 1939 and 1945 was simply more efficient.
Although the Holocaust lasted a relatively brief period, it turned my parents' lives inside out, destroying their families, affecting them till the end of their days.
There are now people who suggest the Holocaust never happened. I will not spend time here denying such a preposterous allegation. "Fortunately" The Nazis and other oppressors in the Holocaust in many cases kept detailed records of their crimes. There is much written record, photography and film footage, much of which is available on the Internet.
I urge the non-Jewish reader of this site to do some researching of the subject.
Anyone wishing to research the Holocaust can simply start with any search engine, keying in such words as "Auschwitz", "Treblinka", "Lodz Ghetto" and literally hundreds of other keywords and place names in Europe - some of them beautiful cities and towns, but made notorious during the war by the atrocities committed there against the Jews - by the massacres of the local Jewish populations, or by the proximity of concentration camps. They will find many details of the atrocities, including photographs taken by the oppressors, and personal stories by the survivors. Although I could provide scores - hundreds - of links, I am providing only two as a starting point for research.
I also urge the non-Jewish reader to one day visit Auschwitz.